The rain splattering across my windshield, zipping around the city in my Toyota I merge across busy streets and manage (whew!) to not get side-swiped by cars as I merge onto another road packed with more cars practicing their own maneuvering stunts, even before 9am! City drivers turn four short miles into a chaotic trip across town. You just never know who might blare their horn on you as you ease out into the left lane to turn, or when you wait 15 minutes to go 15 feet during rush hour.
Regardless, I’ve survived this city life so far. And I have to say, its been such an exhilarating season. However, the wedding I’m in coming up in August looms in my thoughts. I purse my lips and hold my breath as I imagine the straps of the bridesmaid dress choking my throat in my waltz down the aisle. But more important, I’ve been thinking of the pettiness of weddings. Don’t get me wrong, wedding season is the most fabulous time. Nothing can measure up to the thrill of seeing your best friend in her wedding gown to be, twirling in front of the mirror, her eyes dazzle and plead with you in the mirror. Is this the one? What will he think? These moments suspend in time.
Nothing can match the cartwheels in your stomach as you fumble with the buttons on her dress, as you giggle with the other bridesmaids, the tension builds as you weave down the aisle and grip the bouquet, holding your breath as they exchange vows. The joy is palpable and love is the backdrop to a new life. And you realize that her life is changing and you are changing too. Change can be so painful, but in that moment all of those late night DIY projects, rude remarks from the bride about your real life schedule conflicts, and stifling the screams building up after each time the bride unloads her drama filled life with you: Bridesmaid #3 went on a weekend vacation when I had a wedding thing planned that weekend. What is this? Is she that selfish? Does she think I labored over cleaning up her wedding venue for nothing? Anyways, my hopes are up that this wedding season will be a learning season (what wedding doesn’t teach you something new about yourself – I can’t believe I have that kind of stamina to stay up past midnight and paint crates, my toenails and paste flowers to center piece vases!), and a fabulous one too.