Today on my commute into the city, I rode the metro and walked the streets of DC, dodging pedestrians on the crosswalks and soaking in the morning light as I sip on my Starbucks iced mocha, things I do almost every day. But it would be a lie to say the past few haven’t been overly stressful or that it has no impact on how I live my life. It does. Especially when a group of Metro police congregate near metro turnstiles, checking bags, passing out fliers with a big caricature of a suspicious package on them. All the while I tell myself that it’s just another day, that this happens all the time and that they’re being extra cautious. The truth is, the world I live in is way more dangerous than the one my parents lived in thirty years ago.
Some days its easier numbing out the pain and chaos. I sift through Pinterest, read a novel on my Kindle, take pictures on Insta and mindlessly like my friends’ Facebook pictures. But then I walk through DC and pass by people with hollow eyes and slumped shoulders. Old men with furrowed brows, young men in suits and ties, women in heels or slacks, all searching, hoping, aching. They’re all making decisions today that impact the rest of their lives and I act like they’re not my responsibility. I act like I have so much time to waste making myself happy. I’ve been so convicted lately about this. I’ve tried to spend so much time making myself happy when the Lord wants to use me in a big way for His glory but instead of letting Him work, I run for comfort instead of Him. I chase down joy and hope in clothes and guys and friendships and then I come running back to him with a broken, messy heart and He’s there the whole time with compassion and mercy and love filling His heart and His eyes, His arms open wide saying, “Come to me all who are thirsty.”
So now instead of running from this next season of life – I want to face it. I want to stop living in fear of how wicked the world has become and start walking out my faith. And I feel God pulling me in the direction of His will even now, even when I’ve felt so far from Him, I know that it’s always been Him tugging me closer, urging for me to go deeper, reminding me of His great love and how he hasn’t given up on me yet and how He has always believed in me and how He has great plans to use me to make Him known.
And so I hope that if anything you’d realize you’re not alone in this crazy old world, trying to find enough courage to take the next step to accomplish your goal. Stop feeling paralyzed and go. Seek out where the Lord is calling you. Go and don’t be afraid. Trust Him. Live a fearless, messy life.Because comfortable is always safe but never leads us closer to Him. And maybe it’s time to stop letting fear be our god and start taking steps of faith. Loving the homeless, the poor, the needy. Actually stopping to tell someone about Jesus. Not being afraid to stand up for the girl everyone laughs at. Hugging someone who is hurting. Praying for someone who is struggling. Listening when you’d rather run. Surrendering when you’d rather stress and worry and freak out.
Let’s let this season be one of becoming. Becoming more like Him, the lover of our souls.