His voice again.
She fisted her hands. I have to fight this, she thought desperately as she pushed away the feelings.
It didn’t matter that he had perfect brown eyes. Or that in his arms she forgot to breathe. Or that she’d memorized almost everything about him.
It didn’t matter that every time someone brought him up, her stomach pitched like being on Apollo’s Chariot at Busch Gardens. She knew that he’d moved on to another girl. Who was of course perfectly gorgeous and docile.
Feet glued to the floor, she prayed a prayer of surrender.
Not my will, Lord.
How could she hold this against him still? How could she still care for him even after all of this time?
He took her arm. “Hey Shari, aren’t you going to sit with me?”
“For real?” Shari gaped at him. “What about Anna?”
She’d promised herself that she would avoid this church service, because she knew he’d be there. But today, she hadn’t been thinking.
“She goes to a different church.”
Of course. “Well, great. Look, I have to go….find a seat.”
“And I have no idea why you can’t just sit with me.”
“I’m saving a seat for Erin.”
“You don’t talk with Erin anymore.”
“I thought I could do this, but.” Shaking her head, Shari spun and slipped out the door into the crisp fall breeze that picked up her auburn hair and tossed it in front of her face.
Talking with him stung. Especially when he was kind and genuinely acted like he cared. She would forget. She would move on. It didn’t matter how many times she’d pray for him, or pray about the situation, she would push through. This didn’t have to be the end of her.
“He never cared about me, Lord. I was just another pretty, hot girl to him. I never mean anything to any guy ever. It’s my appearance that draws them, but my personality has them making U-turns. Why my knees still get weak when I’m with him, I don’t know. I hope some day I will. Please take it all away.”